Divorce mediation is a delicate process that requires thoughtful collaboration and strategic planning.
Unfortunately,
counterproductive
approaches,
such
as
emotional
gridlock,
financial
misunderstandings, and unrealistic expectations, create obstacles that prevent progress and
compromise outcomes. These barriers, from emotional gridlock to financial misunderstandings, can
derail even the most promising mediation sessions.
Certified Divorce Lending Professionals (CDLPs®) offer a unique skill set to help overcome these
hurdles. With specialized training in divorce mortgage planning and many having received basic
mediation skills training, CDLPs are equipped to address financial complexities and support
productive negotiations during settlement discussions, ensuring that financial stability and mortgage
solutions remain aligned with settlement goals.
Understanding Counter-Productive Approaches in Mediation
Mediation is designed to be collaborative but can quickly become adversarial without the right
guidance. Some of the most common counter-productive behaviors include:
Emotion-Driven Decisions: When emotions take precedence over logic, divorcing couples often
make reactionary rather than strategic decisions. For example, a spouse may demand to keep the
marital home without considering affordability or eligibility for mortgage refinancing.
1.
Lack of Financial Clarity: Many divorcing couples lack an understanding of their financial
situation, particularly how it relates to mortgage qualification or property division. This leads to
unrealistic expectations and prolonged negotiations.
2.
Failure to Plan for Cash Flow Needs: Post-divorce cash flow concerns often go unaddressed during
mediation. Without evaluating future income, debts, and expenses, settlements can collapse when
financial realities surface.
3.
Overlooking Mortgage and Real Estate Implications: Mediation discussions often focus on property
division without considering the mortgage’s impact on future financial stability. This oversight can
result in denied loans, legal disputes, or unforeseen tax liabilities.
4.
THE DANGERS OF COUNTER-
PRODUCTIVE APPROACHES DURING
MEDIATION
BREAKING BARRIERS IN DIVORCE MEDIATION—HOW A CDLP® PROVIDES
FINANCIAL CLARITY AND STRATEGIC SOLUTIONS
Written by Jody Bruns, President Divorce Lending Association
05 DIVORCE REAL ESTATE & MORTGAGE JOURNAL